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AlbertJayNock

nifferisms

Nifferism is a neologism of my own, which I derived from  Dr. Mardy Grothe's neologism ifferism. An ifferism is an aphorism that starts with the word "if". A nifferism is an ifferism where one or both parts are negative. The most famous one is probably "if you remember the sixties, you weren't there."

I became interested with them one night when I was out with some friends and was talking to them about all the stress I had from my job. After a while, I apologized for complaining so much. One of my friends responded "Hey, if you don't complain about your job it means you're not working hard enough."

I've thought of a few more since then. The general theme is that if you don't have some negative side effect, there's probably something good that you're not doing. In other words, they're expansions of "no pain, no gain".

I once said to a student who was feeling intellectually inadequate "If you never feel stupid, you're not getting a good education".

Another piece of advice for students would be "If your friends aren't making fun of you, you're not studying hard enough."

A piece of advice for teachers is "If you never complain about your students, you are not spending enough time with them." That's really a corollary to my friends aphorism about work.

Outside of the topic of education, one could say "If Christopher Hitchens has never offended you, you haven't read enough of his work to call yourself a fan."

Some advice to writers would be "If you've never written anything bad, you're not writing enough." I thought of this one immediately after re-reading the one about Christopher Hitchens. Clearly it applies to those who write ifferisms.

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