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A Car That Runs On Self-Esteem

 Saturday night I accidentally had dinner with similarsmell,iatethecookie, and a young lady who works at Jackson's Java. I say accidentally because I was at Chili's eating at the bar and heard similarsmell's voice behind me. His voice is even more immediately recognizable than my profile. I looked behind me, saw them, and asked if I could join them.

We talked about a lot of things (including M1...for some perverse, sadistic reason I always feel compelled to talk about that whenever I see similarsmell.).  The subject of alternative fuels came up and iatethecookie jokingly suggested "a car that runs on the power of my own self-worth."

Let me reiterate that iatethecookie was joking. But what if someone was dumb/crazy enough to try to build such a car? It gave me an idea for a novel or a screenplay. A guy designs a car that is powered by his own self-esteem, and actually builds it. Of course it doesn't run. But the guy is so stupid he thinks it is because his self-esteem is too low, and not because a car that runs on self-esteem makes cold fusion look as feasible as indoor plumbing. So he could keep doing things to build his self-esteem. As his  self-esteem grows, he becomes less amenable to any suggestion that his idea was really stupid. Hilarity ensues.

It might be a good story. Of course, it's possible that trying to turn this idea into any major work of fiction is the literary equivalent of a car that runs on self-esteem. Maybe if it was pared down to two or three pages it might make a good philosophical parable. (I am not as stupid or egotistical as my fictional character...I am willing and able to revise my goals.)


now I really feel like Butters...

I just realized that The Simpsons once had a cameo by Ed Begley Jr. where he showed off a go-cart that was powered by his sense of self-satisfaction.

Re: now I really feel like Butters...

Me too. There's nothing worse than feeling like butters. At least neither one of us has ever had a tap-dancing accident that caused the death of 16 people.

Re: now I really feel like Butters...

For a minute there it seemed like a perfectly cromulent idea.