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Of Condoms And Combs

I was interviewed by the school newspaper here today. They had selected me as faculty member of the month. Before I went, it occurred to me that they might take my picture and that it would be a good idea for me to comb my hair. And then it occurred to me that I didn't have a comb. Alas.

So I stopped by the bookstore and looked in the personal items section for a comb. They didn't seem to have any for sale. Alas redux.

I did notice that they had rows and rows of condoms. This seemed odd. I wondered if there could possibly be more of a demand for condoms than there is for combs. Not only that, but if you think about it, the use of a comb should precede  the use of a condom. I know men are swine, but a fellow should have to do something to make himself more attractive before he seduces a woman.

I realize that my real life friends find it odd that I am making such a big deal about this, since grooming is not my strong suit (to put it mildly). But hell, if I really want to win a ladies favor I'll comb my hair. Sometimes I even tuck my shirt tail in!

Ladies, do not surrender your treasure to a man without making him comb his hair first. If enough of you follow this advice, there will be a better market for combs and I will be able to find one when I need it.


"They had selected me as faculty member of the month."

Thank you :)
congrats Mr, Faculty Member of the Month. Way to go!
Thank you. :)
This is very good advice any man would be wise to follow.

Congratulations on being faculty member of the month! Do you get a special parking spot or anything?